Wednesday, September 24, 2008

From fear through the eyes of madness

So this is my second attempt at blogging. Hopefully this will live a lot longer than the first one. Or maybe not. I have a short attention span to most things, which is rather unfortunate, because sometimes the things I do give my time to just seem to be so unfulfilling. I have the occasional bouts of fear, loneliness and an all pervasive need to understand and better my life. Usually I sit around and wait till this feeling passes. It's almost as if I've given up. What I've given up I have no idea. If emptiness is loneliness and loneliness is cleanliness and cleanliness is godliness then is God empty? I don't particularly believe in God despite the best efforts of people I know (and eventhough I follow and bow to the tradition of capitalizing the G). If He (note the 'H') truly exists then how about some proof. And I'd like it personalized please. Sometimes I think I'm understanding and accepting purely because the alternative is just so tedious to go through. I live for the music, the rush of life when I'm with someone special, the high of a Killing Frenzy! on Halo 3, a clever phrase, an intelligent joke. Am I human? Yes. Am I flawed? Yes I am.

'Debate to understand that we all have a flaw'

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